Heartbreak.

3

April 4, 2019 by Cláudia

I’ve experienced heartbreak many times. A break-up. A death of a loved one. An estranged parent. A selfish action done by a friend. Right now I’m experiencing a type of heartbreak that I never even considered. Especially because it is ultimately a good thing.

There is a dog in a shelter who I’ve been visiting for over two years and who I was planning on adopting as soon as possible. He’s 14 years old and has been waiting to be adopted for over 10 years now. He’s not very bright, he doesn’t know how to play and he has leishmaniasis. But I loved him unconditionally and, because I thought the chances of him being adopted were so slim, I was 100% sure he would come to my house and live with me and my boyfriend. That was what our little family would look like in less than a year. I have bonded with different dogs who got adopted, but they were just a possibility – I’ll adopt them if no one does until I get my own place. But he was a certainty.

Being away from home, yesterday at lunch I was feeling blue because I missed him and I kept thinking that in less than a month I would come home and visit him again. I just hate the thought of him being alone in the shelter. But not long after consoling myself, I got a phone call from the shelter saying that someone fell in love with him and would like to take him home. I was surprised they felt like they had to call me to know what I thought. I immediately told them it was amazing news and that he’s waited long enough.

And then went to bed crying. Because I’m far away and I can’t even see him one last time to say goodbye. Because humans are selfish and therefore I cannot help but feeling sad for myself that I won’t see him anymore. What I always wanted was for him to get a home, but I always thought it would be mine. They say when you love someone let them go. He deserves to be cosy, warm and loved by his new family.

Be happy my sweet angel. I’ll never forget you.